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Does He Love Me? 10 Signs Your Spouse Is Still Head Over Heels

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Does He Love Me? 10 Signs Your Spouse Is Still Head Over Heels

Experts break down how you can really tell he loves you, even after all these years.

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All marriages change with time and it's normal even desirable for the insane passion of your early years together to settle into a relaxed companionship. Still that shift might lead many to believe that

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their partners have fallen out of love although according to Stan Tatkin a psychologist and author of Wired for Love this is likely not the case. Here he and other experts offer 10 subtle signs that your husband is still madly in love with you.

He looks you in the eye.

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When he is sitting across from you at dinner he is not on his phone or glancing elsewhere. He look you right in the eyes attentively listening to everything you have to say according to research by

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psychologist Zick Rubin couples that are deeply in love with each other look at each other 75% of the time while regular people conversing only look at one another 30-60% of the time. In other words strong eye contact shows that he is truly interested in everything you have to say.

He always says "whatever you want" for date night.

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It's easy to take this as a sign of disinterest but Paul Coleman a psychologist and author of Finding Peace When Your Heart is in Pieces says that when men are in love they usually appear less enthusiastic than women do this is because of their lower levels of serotonin according to research published in the Journal of Psychophysiology. "The amount of serotonin you have in your body as a

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woman makes you act happy and show it more" said Coleman. "But because men's levels are not as high, they don't feel the need to do that they are happy showing you love by agreeing to do whatever it is you want to do even if it's just sitting next to you and watching TV." Rather than being frustrated because you are the one coming up with date night ideas look at it as an opportunity to branch out and try something different.

He says your first name during sex.

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It's part of the norm to call each other babe or honey throughout the day but Tatkin says that if he says your first name in the midst of sex it's a sign that he is fully present in the moment with you and

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doesn't want to be intimate with anyone else. Another clue? Eye contact in the bedroom as Tatkin says it shows that he is interested and only thinking about you.

He loves you quietly.

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When you first got together he couldn't keep his hands off of you no matter the time of day. If you have been married for many years it's possible that this is no longer the case don't worry Tatkin says as he might just express his love differently. "At the beginning of all successful relationships the

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constant excitement of new love produces a lot of dopamine which is the same neurotransmitter that's stimulated when a drug addict takes their drug of choice" he says. "It's exhilarating but temporary." Quiet love on the other hand comes into the picture when that exhilaration starts to fade. "It's a calm but alert state couples get into when they are fully relaxed and engaged with one another" he explains. So he still loves you he just shows it in other ways.

He'll go to that party without whining.

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We can all think of a time when your best friend was having a party and your husband truly didn't want to go but how did he react? If he doesn't give you grief then he is showing you love. "When you say that you really want him with you and then he just puts on his party clothes without grumbling he

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is putting aside his own preferences and tastes to make you happy" says Sophia Dembling author of Introverts in Love: The Quiet Way to Happily Ever After he wouldn't do that if he didn't love you proving that sometimes what he doesn't do speaks louder than what he does.

He's quick to end an argument.

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Another way he proves that he is still head over heels for you is by letting you win an argument. "He puts you ahead of having to be right because he knows that any delay in fixing misunderstandings or hurt feelings can lead to a long lasting memory that doesn't bode well for your future" Tatkin says.

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So when he throws up a white flag he is not doing it out of laziness he just doesn't want to see you upset. Next time you find yourself in this situation take a step back and consider whether it's more essential to be right or resolve the problem.

He puts the electronics away.

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We are all guilty of being glued to our phones but when your husband actively cuts technology out of his daily routine to spend time with you it's a sign that he still wants to connect says Fawn Weaver author of Happy Wives Club. "When a man loves a woman no matter how demanding his job he knows how to put his phone down close his laptop and give his undivided attention" she says. "There

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is a consistent effort to put his love ahead of his career and friends." Now that doesn't mean he is going to drop what he's doing at the exact second you want him to he is not at your beck and call but if he makes a concerted effort to carve out quality time for the two of you without tech then he is still deeply in love with you.

He knows you hate doing the dishes, so he does them.

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When you have been together for years it's obvious that your husband knows your likes and dislikes. But if you want to know if he loves you see how he adjusts to your "irritation triggers." "If he knows the 3 or 4 things that will always hurt you or put you off balance and then knows just what to do to either avoid them or get you up and running again when they do happen then consider him your

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antidote" Tatkin says. So rather than picking a fight because it's your turn to take care of the dishes you are more likely to find him loading up the machine before bed just remember to return the favor and handle something that drives him batty or at least consider taking dish duty as a thank you because we bet he does o't love that chore as well.

He never says the 'D' word.

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Sure every couple has those drag-out fights but even in the darkest of times your husband never says the word divorce Tatkin says explaining that a happy husband doesn't threaten his relationship even when he is upset, frustrated or incredibly angry. "Nothing good can come from threatening the

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relationship or making you feel like it might not exist in the near future" Tatkin says. Instead he is learned how to communicate through problems healthily because of course you will still have a few fights here and there.

He still makes an effort to surprise you.

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Though you might rule household with shared Google calendars and group text messages if your husband still makes effort to surprise you with things he knows will brighten your day then he is still loving on your pretty hard Weaver says. "This is not about expensive gifts. Oftentimes it's something as simple as bringing home a favorite candy or carton of ice cream or picking up tickets when you

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mentioned you wanted to see a certain movie" she says. The point is that he is thinking of ways to keep your relationship fresh and fun and showing you that he still remembers the little things that make you smile.

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